[Following “Jump Monk, Phish begins “McGrupp and the Watchful Hosemasters”]
TREY: [during Latin-esque groove at end of jam] Once upon a time there was a man called Colonel Forbin, and he was a retired army colonel living in twentieth-century suburbia. One day he found himself shaving in his bathroom, and he was looking into the mirror and thinking about his life. Fifty-two years old and what had he done with his life? Basically nothing. He sat and he looked in the mirror with his dog McGrupp standing next to him, and he thought about the door. The door was a door that he had found recently when walking McGrupp. He was coming over this hill and he saw it, and he didn't believe that it really existed at first. But, he spent weeks walking past the same spot every day. He’d see the door, and he'd wonder about it. Until this one day, he was shaving in his bathroom, and he realized that he was sick of his life and that the time had come to go through the door. So, he took his dog and he walked out onto the street, and he headed up the hill and he headed towards the door.
[Following the end of the narration the song smoothly moves into “The Lizards.” Trey returns to the narration after it concludes.]
TREY: Thank you! Okay, so for those of you who are still following us, Colonel Forbin is standing there, with this knight, Rutherford the Brave, who has just dived into the water. And, across the lake he sees this ugly monster, the Unit Monster, who comes up dives into the lake and saves Rutherford the Brave. So, Colonel Forbin is standing on the side of the lake, kneeling, and up from the woods comes the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen in his life, riding on an enormous two-toned multibeast. So, she comes riding up and he looks at her and he instantly falls in love.
[“Tela’ comes next, to be followed by “Wilson” with only “thanks yous” between]
TREY: [over the beginning of “Wilson”] Okay, so here's Colonel Forbin falling in love with Tela, who's riding on the big two-toned multibeast. She reaches down, and she pulls him up onto the back of the multibeast. And, they go riding off into the forest, deeper and deeper into the forest.
Anyway, they're going, riding deeper and deeper into the forest, and as they ride, Tela tells Colonel Forbin about the revolution. They're trying to overthrow the Evil King Wilson. They ride along. She tells him that the revolution is being run by a guy named Errand Wolfe, and they're heading towards the base camp to meet this guy, the base camp of the revolution. They're going to meet Errand Wolfe.
Errand Wolfe got on this whole revolution kick when his son Roger was executed in the public square by Wilson. So they ride deeper and deeper until they finally reached the outskirts of the camp, and they see up in the distance, they look and they see a man standing in the clearing. It's Errand Wolfe, and he's a small man but his power is overbearing. As they ride closer and closer., as they near him, he raises his fist in anger and he screams:
[begins first verse of “Wilson”]
TREY: [after the blap-boop ending] Meanwhile, in the public square, Wilson is hanging somebody else. He’s standing up there on the scaffolding, next to the AC/DC Bag, an electronic robot hangman, plug-in hangman, with a black bag over his head. They're hanging Mr. Palmer, who is the accountant for Wilson who has been funding the revolution by extorting money from Wilson and sending it to them. And, there's Mr Palmer, standing up on the scaffolding, and Wilson sings this song.
[“AC/DC Bag” comes next. Narration begins after its conclusion]
TREY: Okay, so the revolution is going haywire, and as a last-ditch attempt to save things, Colonel Forbin decides he's going to climb up the mountain and find Iculus, the Great and Knowledgeable ahhh--oh-ahhhh Icculus. We all know who he is! He's going to find Icculus and he's going to ask Icculus to help him by sending the Helping Friendly Book, which Wilson is keeping in the highest tower in his castle. He's going to send the Helping Friendly Book to save the revolutionaries. Here he goes now, climbing towards the mountain.
[“Colonel Forbin’s Ascent” followed by “Fly Famous Mockingbird” comes next, which features narration at its beginning]
TREY: And the famous Mockingbird came down and landed on Icculus’ shoulder and flew off to get the Helping Friendly Book. [“Fly Famous Mockingbird” continues, and the narration returns after its conclusion]
TREY: Okay, thank you. So at this point in time [tape cut] with us. We've got Colonel Forbin, who goes up the mountain [tape cut]. Icculus? You know the song about Icculus, Steve! Come on. Come on! No really now, this is the important part here, because Errand Wolfe, who is heading the revolution now, has the Helping Friendly Book, and he gets a little bit greedy. Instead of doing the right thing he stowes the famous mockingbird with glue and rubber bands against a pole, and picks up the book and goes into town to find the meanest man in town to help him execute Wilson so that he can take over as the next Evil King. And you know who he gets to do the job.
[unintelligible conversation between Trey and Mike, including Mike asking about “the whole other thing” before Trey counts off “The Sloth” which will be followed by the final narration]
TREY: Okay so, that's it so, they kill Wilson! Wilson’s dead! Ayyyy, long live Wilson! Errand Wolfe, the new Wilson, takes over. And, somewhere up on top of the mountain there Icculus is dancing around as he usually does, looking around at all the stupidity going around in the valley below him, and singing in his metaphorical way:
[“Possum” concludes this version of The Man Who Stepped Into Yesterday]
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