TREY: Just getting my guitar in tune here… Some things that we know and some things that we don’t know. For real. Some of the things that we know here… We’re all standing up here playing for you right now, looking down at you. Some of the things that you don’t know. Some of you don’t know what I was singing about here, some of you know what I was singing about here.
There’s the people that know what I was singing about here. Some of you look like you don’t know what I was singing about. Well, lemme just tell you something here. The other thing that you don’t know is that we’re not actually standing up here playing music for you right now. That’s right ladies and gentlemen, through the miracles of technology we have now developed a new technique where we have sent holographic images of ourselves to come play for you tonight.
We’re right back in Vermont right now in the middle of a storm. We didn’t wanna come out here, all the way to L.A. so I hope that you’re enjoying our holographic images that are standing up here. As a matter of fact, if you look up very closely, you have to squint a little bit, look very closely, you’ll see that there is a big frame around the stage and we are simply holographic images playing for you.
As a matter of fact, there is something else you don’t know. None of you are standing out there either. That’s right. We’ve sent holographic images of you: you’re all actually at home. The thing is that this, this image… You all signed up to come to this concert, and when you signed up we told you that we’re gonna send holographic images of you to the concert. You’re all lying safely in your beds right now. You signed up for it, and it’s so realistic that none of you now that you are here even remember signing up for the holographic Phish concert. Here it is right now, the holographic Phish concert. We hope that you are all enjoying the holographic Phish concert.
So, like I said, there is a big frame around here, and as a matter of fact, if you can kind of picture it, just so I can explain it to you. When you get home by the way, you won’t remember any of this. You’ll just remember it as a regular concert. But, it’s implanted in your brain there that it’s holographic concert. One of the first of it’s kind, lemme tell ya.
There is basically a big hologr- I’ll just explain how it works. There is a big holographic frame around us, the whole building if you can picture it. So, if you can kind of picture yourself in a picture frame but in 3-D from holographs, and you know, somebody, imagine.. somebody can pick on them… As a matter of fact there IS a person coming from way over there now.
The incredible thing about this holographic concert is that it is actually pretty tiny. The whole, entire building is taking place here in a small, 6 inch frame, and right now my actual being, I’m a holograph, is reaching down over there. If you can really imagine it, my hand is picking up the corner of the building right now, and I’m just kind of picking up the whole holographic frame and just tilting it over on it’s side like that. Awww, and everything is falling over on it’s side. Luckily this is holograph land so you can continue standing straight up because you’re only a holograph.
Right now you’re up on it’s side and and my... Real Trey is standing over there with a hand, and I’m now taking you, I’m about to fling you off into the distance. But, I’m walking down to the beach, and I’m holding this holographic image of this building in my hand. I’m standing on my side like that. [Trey makes some rhythmic grunt sounds], and I’m getting ready to fling you into the ocean. [The grunt grows louder, and finally a WHOOSH sound is made]
Now you’re skipping across the ocean [Sound effects continue until a SPLASH sound is made]. And, now the whole building is sinking underneath the water The whole building is underneath the water. It’s going down, down into the deep green of the ocean, and as we go down, we see coral reefs over on our side, kind of waving, waving with the current of the water. On our left we see a little school of Kingfish. On our right we see some shellfish going down to the bottom, suddenly a big octopus... swimming by.
We’re still kinda rocking back and forth to the bottom of the ocean. We’re about to land down on the sand. Suddenly a big shark appears in the distance. [Trey haphazardly references Jaws] DUNH-DUNH, DUNH DUNH. So, the shark is coming out, and the shark kind of picks us up in the corner of his mouth. He starts to swim along, and now we’re in the corner of the shark’s mouth and the shark is so big, he’s kind of gliding along the edge of the bottom.
He goes out past this little reef out there, and he goes over there. He’s circling around now, and suddenly we look down and we see this shark holding us over this huge vast cavern that goes down, seems to go down for a far as the eye can see. He takes the holographic image in his mouth, and he goes swimming around right now, swimming around. Then he decides that he doesn’t really like it and he drops the holograph into the hole.
We’re sinking down below the bottom of the sea. It’s getting darker and darker all around us and colder and colder. We’re going deeper and deeper, and as we go deeper the water turns to slush. It’s getting thicker and thicker. We’re deeper now than we’ve ever been, deeper than any human being has ever been before. Luckily, we can still breathe because we’re holographic images so we’re not real. So, we’re going down deeper and deeper and deeper, and the water actually gets thicker and thicker. We feel like it’s getting hotter now. It’s not cold anymore because we’re getting closer to the center of the Earth, to the mantle, to the core, hotter and hotter and blazing.
We start to feel the sweat dripping off the sides of our body. It’s harder to breathe. Deeper and deeper and deeper until we slowly come, until we feel like we’re reaching the edge of something, we’re at the bottom. Suddenly we come pushing on this membrane that’s at the center of the Earth. And the… [Trey makes a SWOOSH sound] And, now we’re floating down, floating down through the air. We’ve ended up someplace different.
We don’t know where we are. Floating down… Floating down in the wind and we start to look over, we look over that way, and we see a vast green field stretching off into the distance. We look over that way and we see a huge forest going off, stretching as far as the eyes can see, and it is sorta spinning. Behind this forest, we see an enormous mountain, the biggest mountain we’ve ever seen, and we’re still floating downwards.
We realize that we’re coming to a landing in [in a deep voice] Gamehendge... [Evil laugh and a cacophony of musical noise] Gamehendge. That’s what I was singing about, for those of you who didn’t know. We’re in Gamehendge, and we look over to the mountain there and we see this little speck on the mountain, a tiny little speck. We come a little closer and we aim our picture over, floating a little over… We see that this not just a little speck, this is a little guy, and this little guy is climbing up the mountain right now.
This guy’s name is Colonel Forbin, and that’s what the last song was about. That’s right because this whole land here, Gamehendge, for thousands of years all the people of Gamehendge lived in peace and tranquility, with nature in Gamehendge here. What happened was, one day this traveler came to Gamehendge. His name was Wilson, and he had been in the outside world, he realized that he could enslave all these people. So, what he did was he took the book that they used to guide their life, the book that taught them how to live in peace and harmony with nature, and stole it.
This book was called The Helping Friendly Book. And he put the book in the highest tower in his castle in the middle of Gamehendge. Right now, Colonel Forbin, who's also come to Gamehendge, is trying to bring peace and tranquility back to the people of Gamehendge, the Lizard people. So, he’s climbing up the mountain right now, and he’s climbing up the mountain. He’s grabbing onto roods, and rocks are falling all over his head. He’s trying to find the spirit of the Great and Knowledgeable Icculus, who lives on top of the mountain.
He goes up, coming up the mountain, rocks are coming down. He sees the spirit of the great and knowledgeable Icculus. He says, “Icculus, you’ve gotta help me get The Helping, Friendly Book back to the people of Gamehendge.” So, Icculus says, “Let me send for my friend, The Famous Mockingbird.” And, the Famous Mockingbird comes flying out of the sky. Icculus is gonna tell him to fly to the castle, steal the book, bring it back to the people, they’re gonna live in peace and harmony forever and ever. We hope. The story goes on from here but it doesn’t really matter because right now The Famous Mockingbird is flying out of the sky and he’s going to the castle of the evil King Wilson and he’s gonna steal The Helping, Friendly Book.
So here it comes now, The Famous Mockingbird...
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