If any song is "soul crushing" and the following song makes things worse, maybe it's time to find a new hobby. I was forced to to see Clay Aiken live back in the 90's but my experience didn't seem quite as traumatic as yours.
I'm a long time fan and I'm disappointed to see that kind of hating in a main phish.net review
The Mockingbird Foundation is a non-profit organization founded by Phish fans in 1996 to generate charitable proceeds from the Phish community.
And since we're entirely volunteer – with no office, salaries, or paid staff – administrative costs are less than 2% of revenues! So far, we've distributed over $1,000,000 to support music education for children – hundreds of grants in all 50 states, with more on the way.